Tuesday, April 12, 2011

The joys of spring

Ahh spring. Or as I like to call it, guess what that shriveled plant-like-object will turn into season.

You see I like to pretend I have a green thumb. Every year I look for new flowers or the occasional bush or tree to add to the cluster-f@$! that is my flower beds. Most of them survive. At least, most of the ones that are supposed to.

You see, I have two criteria for picking plants: 1) it looks pretty. 2) it has to be marked "full sun" or it will shrivel up and die in seconds in our twig-tree-spotted lot.

Case in point. Last year we killed a dogwood tree. There is ONE spot of sorta-mostly shade along the east side of our house. Halfway through the summer, Hubby decided he was tired of spraying our entire house with rust-off where the sprinklers hit it, so he turned the sprinkler head that was giving the dogwood a fighting chance. And then it was 95 degrees for a week straight.

I'll let you figure out the rest.

So while I may pick pretty purple or yellow flowers, most of the time I don't remember what they're called, or if they are annuals or perennials. And that's right after I plant them. There is no way in HECK I can remember what I planted where for an entire year.

So my flower beds look like this:

Even if we have a warm spell before it's late enough to be planting, I don't normally pull the flower carcasses. Because I don't know if it's going to come back or not. I wait until they look like this:

So since that green is there, I'm pretty sure I can pull the dry stuff carefully. Unless that's a weed growing where a flower was last year...hmm...

Then there are my bulbs. For the last three years, a neighbor kid has come knocking on my door selling bulbs for a PTA fundraiser. If they're brave enough to knock on my door, most of the time I oblige. Because one day that will by MY kid peddling gosh-only-knows-what door-to-door and it'll be their parents' turn to fork over some cash.


This is the first year that my daffodils actually bloomed before Fourth of July. The irises did bloom last year, but earlier than the daffodils, so instead of the nice pretty yellow purple mix, I had green confused stalks.

See? Isn't that pretty?

Then there's these guys.

I'm pretty sure he is one of two I just bought and planted last year. I knew it was too late for them to bloom, but I hoped that this time I could plant them and they'd still be there in the spring. I hadn't had any luck doing that before, but third time's the charm, right?

But of course, if they follow their older bulb siblings, I'll be in this same spot next year, wondering what the little green stalk will turn into.

Along with all the other brown stuff.

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